Regardless where you sit, stand, or wrestle with the issue of women in church leadership, this satirical list was passed on to me and is worth sharing, both for laughter and even reflection, because that’s what good satire forces us to do.

Here are…

10 reasons Why Men Should Not Be Ordained For Ministry:

10. A man’s place is in the army.

9. The pastoral duties of men who have children might distract them from the responsibility of being a parent.

8. The physique of men indicates that they are more suited to such tasks as chopping down trees and wrestling mountain lions. It would be “unnatural” for them to do ministerial tasks.

7. Man was created before woman, obviously as a prototype. Thus, they represent an experiment rather than the crowning achievement of creation.

6. Men are too emotional to be priests or pastors. Their conduct at football and basketball games demonstrates this.

5. Some men are handsome, and this will distract women worshipers.

4. Pastors need to nurture their congregations. But this is not a traditional male role. Throughout history, women have been recognized as not only more skilled than men at nurturing, but also more fervently attracted to it. This makes them the obvious choice for ordination.

3. Men are prone to violence. No really masculine man wants to settle disputes except by fighting about them. Thus they would be poor role models as well as dangerously unstable in positions of leadership.

2. The New Testament tells us that Jesus was betrayed by a man. His lack of faith and ensuing punishment remind us of the subordinated position that all men should take.

1. Men can still be involved in church activities, even without being ordained. They can sweep sidewalks, repair the church roof, and perhaps even lead the song service on Father’s Day. By confining themselves to such traditional male roles, they can still be vitally important in the life of the church.

Note: This list was sent to a ministry colleague of mine by his daughter who, together with her husband, are seminary students preparing for ministry.It is the work of Dr. David M. Scholer, a former professor at Fuller Theological Seminary.
Eugene Cho, a second-generation Korean-American, founder and lead pastor of Quest Church in Seattle, and executive director of Q Cafe, an innovative nonprofit neighborhood café and music venue, posted it on his blog site 04/30/2012. It was republished in Sojourners. Find Eugene on his blog, Twitter or Facebook Page. Eugene and his wife are also the founders of a movement of people, stories, and actions to alleviate extreme global poverty.